Thursday, 3 January 2019

5 Signs You Don't Fully Know Your Partner

We all like to believe that we know the person that we love the most in the world, including all of their opinions and feelings on certain situations. The biggest part of feeling connected to someone else is feeling secure in how well you know them, but this connection can sometimes lead you to overlook the blind spots in their personality. Rose tinted glasses and all that, right?

As much as you want your partner to know you inside and out, you want to know them too. For example, they may already know that you have saved in your history from the numerous impersonal gift cards your ex boyfriends gave to you. They also may know that you prefer tulips over roses, but, surely it’s more than that. Knowing your partner is more than the superficial things on the surface. It’s the deeper issues that you need to know more than the rest. So, what are the five signs you don't know your partner as well as you think you do?

  • You haven't met their friends. Friends are our favourite people, and if you haven't been introduced to those that your significant other spends most their time with, that’s a lovely little red flag just waving in the wind. If you aren’t being introduced to the most important people in his life, you have to ask yourself, why not? You need to know who he - or she - is outside of the bubble of your relationship, otherwise you don’t know them at all.
  • Hobbies that don’t include you aren’t usually a red flag. Do you really want to play on his rugby team? Nope. However, if those hobbies enjoy a social calendar that he isn't interested in bringing you into, then you need to think about this carefully. He needs to float you into his world just like you (hopefully) would yours.
  • They clam up about their past on every opportunity. If you’ve been only dating a few weeks, this wouldn't normally be a problem. However, if it's been quite a long time, you may be facing a problem. Let them chat when they’re ready, but just be aware you can’t wait to know forever.
  • The healthiest relationships are those that disagree with each other often. No two people are completely the same - which is perfectly fine, by the way - but it does mean that if you are constantly agreeing, one of you is avoiding a conflict. There’s no way that you would agree on every little detail. Growth is important in a relationship, and learning to talk out issues properly is going to aid that.
  • If you've had a bad day at work and you're obviously upset, but your partner doesn't pick up on it, they clearly don’t know you very well. You need someone who is going to pick up on your emotional cues and learn to understand the type of communication that you need.

Every relationship is different, but you and your partner need a connection and you need to know each other well. No one is wonderful all the time: we all have our quirks and embarrassments. Learn his/hers as much as you can, and with any luck, you'll become much stronger, and happier for it.

Love and light always,

* Please note that this is a collaborative post*

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