Sunday, 26 November 2017

Teen Talk: Dealing With Fake Friends

 

In the years since becoming a teenager, I've grown very aware as to how many people turn out to be fake friends. I used to be incredibly trusting, and always willing to impress anybody, but nowadays, I'd much rather mind my own business, and keep my circle small.

When you're going through secondary school, and ultimately, the phase of peer pressure, it can seem like you need everybody to like you in order to make yourself valuable as an individual. There's an overwhelming desire to get approval from everybody your age, especially those who are seen as being labelled 'the cool clique'.

All throughout primary school, and secondary school, I was never popular. None of the other children really had an interest in being my friend, and they didn't really care whether I liked them or not, because they had already formed their own group - a group that I wasn't ever going to be part of. At the time, it got to me. In fact, it got to me more than I would let on. I was very shy, and very reserved, so I wasn't exactly a joy to make conversation with, unless all you wanted in reply was a couple of stutters from a girl who's cheeks were as red as a tomato. I didn't go out much, I didn't watch Disney Channel religiously, and I didn't wear all the latest fashion. I was quite an outcast, really.

When I was in a little bit of a low place last September, and in a reflective mood, I wrote a blog post about being an introvert. It allowed me to get all of my thoughts out of my mind, so I was able to process them much more easily. If you're an introvert, or you're struggling with shyness, you may find it comforting, or even just somewhat reassuring. At least, I hope you do.

The thing is, you don't need validation from any of your peers. You just need to stay true to who you are. Friendships are empowering, and amazing if they are with the right people. They take time though. You don't just speak to someone once in a blue moon, and suddenly become joined at the hip. It's all about trust, communication, honesty, and to a certain extent, vulnerability. If someone is acting fake, talking about you behind your back, laughing at you, or insulting you, get rid. Don't even waste your energy on them. Don't bother giving all your time to them. They don't deserve it, not for one second.

I suppose cutting off fake friends is like moving on after a break up. Well, not exactly, but there are plenty of similarities. Don't ever give too much of yourself to someone straight away. See how they act within the first few months, see if they start opening up to you, and just take it slowly. Trust your gut, as well. If something seems a bit fishy, then it probably is. Basically just believe your inner instinct. Fake friends usually just want to spread gossip, and put you down at every opportunity they get, so anyone who does that isn't a true friend of yours.

I've come across my fair share of fake friends, but especially since leaving secondary school, I've realised that I'm much more likely to notice the signs, and so I stick with those in my circle, and always act more wary than I need to, just in case.

Hopefully this post has helped some of you. Fake friends are never any fun, but once you have got rid, you can make room for the better ones, which is exactly what I've done!

Lots of love always,


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Wednesday, 22 November 2017

A Miraculous Moisturiser


Even though I've done a blog post about the OY! range (you can find that here), I felt like this miraculous moisturiser deserved a post of it's own.

Being 16 years old, and having already gone through puberty for a number of years, I've definitely noticed how my skin, and the condition of it has changed significantly during that time. It used to be incredibly oily, and problematic, but nowadays, although it does still get oily, and shiny once the evening has come around, it's no-where near as bad as it used to be - thank goodness!

I never used to really look after my skin, and I certainly didn't consider moisturising it. I think that a common misconception when you have oily skin is that you shouldn't dare to touch moisturiser, because that'll have the opposite effect, and therefore produce more oil. However, that's completely wrong! Everybody needs to moisturise, and everybody needs to look after their skin properly. The key is to tailor your moisturiser towards your skin type. If you have really, desperately dry skin, then use a thick, heavy duty moisturiser to pamper yourself. If you have oily-combination skin, like myself, it's better if you stick to a light-weight, thin moisturiser, just like this one.

There's been a couple of moisturisers here and there that I have thought are decent, or that I'd put in a top 5, but honestly, this one takes the crown! Not only does it come in really nice, simple, effortlessly cute packaging, but it also smells nice, and refreshing too. I either apply it with my fingers, or with a brush to properly blend it in, and I've used it most days for a couple of months now, which goes to show that a little pea sized blob does go a really long way.

It's the only moisturiser that I can say has genuinely worked for me, and I will continue to repurchase it for the foreseeable future. It's £11, but I'd say it's well worth every penny!
 
Have you ever tried anything from Green People's OY! range? What do you think?
 
Lots of love always,
 
 
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Sunday, 19 November 2017

For Those Who Need It...

You may believe that you're battling with your darkest demons right now
And you might not be able to see the way to the exit
But, just remember that there is always a light at the end of the tunnel
Whatever it is that you're going through, it won't last for the rest of your life
You have to go through the bloodiest of battles to recognise that you are one of the strongest soldiers
Every single person who goes through hardships is a survivor, and that's a fact
It's the darkest nights and the toughest of times that produce the brightest stars and the bravest people

Your dark days do not define you
I know that right now you feel as if the weight of the world is on your shoulders
But, I promise you that one day you will find inner peace
You are strong enough to overcome any obstacles
And handle any of the hurdles that get placed in your path
Find that strength from within and hold onto it
Have hope when it comes to your future, trust what is meant to be, and let go of what has already happened
Even in your darkest of days, there will always be someone by your side
I will always be by your side
Cheering you on, and clapping whenever you have proven yourself wrong
I believe that you are capable of achieving anything, so you must believe it too

- JM
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Sunday, 5 November 2017

My Top Tips For Writing Poetry

Being able to read, and write is something that I will never take for granted. Quite honestly, this ability has changed my life, and shaped me into the person that I am today.

Even when I was much younger, I was always into reading stories, or making up my own - and, within the last few years, I've also discovered a love for poetry.

Today, I thought I'd share with you a couple of the things that I've learned along the way, in the hope that they may be of help to you too.

Get inspiration from everywhere
People may wonder where poets actually find inspiration for their poems from. Well, the truth is, it can come from absolutely anywhere! The most important thing to me is that each piece is personal, and emotional, but it all depends on the individual, and what they feel they're writing for in the first place. Think about past experiences, the people in your life, nature, society, politics - anything!
 
Make sure it all comes from the heart, and no-where else 
If your poems come from the heart, it's more likely that your audience will actually connect to the words that are written as if they are words you have spoken. Poems are such an individual form of art, and for other people to relate, and understand them without even knowing the person shows that a true masterpiece has been made.
 
Focus on the flow of the feelings
The thing with poetry is that with any form of literature, there's not just one genre, or style that fits all. There's spoken word, prose, haikus, soliloquy's, ballads, odes, and many more! I personally tend to write without any particular structure, or thought about the layout, and I put an emphasis on the words, rather than the appearance.
 
Not every poem has to rhyme
Whenever I start to write, I hardly ever think about whether I want my sentences to rhyme or not. Sometimes they do, and sometimes they don't. There's no set rules with poetry, ya know. Some are longer, some are shorter, and they aren't all going to be identical, even if they are about the same, or a similar subject. The whole purpose is to express yourself through words, and so as long as you feel you're doing that for yourself, then that's all that matters!
 
Those are just a few of my top tips for if you're wanting to get into poetry writing. It's a really fantastic, rewarding hobby, and it's even something that I'd consider pursuing as a career in the future. Whether you want just want to express your emotions, or you want to do it as a way of helping other people, you should definitely give it a go!
 
For those who are interested, my poetry account on Instagram is @jmpoetry_x!
 
Lots of love always,
 
 

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